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  • Writer's pictureTrisha Lord

As luck would have it ...

Luck /lʌk/ (noun): Success or failure apparently brought by chance rather than through one’s own actions.

Ever since I first entered the field that has gone on to become that of my chosen profession - developing human potential - I have built my approach to my work and my life on the principle that relationship is the source of results. Actions produce results, but the environment in which one is taking action is an environment that is embedded in a whole web of relationships. And when push comes to shove, when you’ve tried and failed – and you are at the end of knowing what to do (actions), it is to the people with whom you have relationships built on trust, transparency, respect, and a collaborative spirit that you will turn. It is these people who will set you straight on your path again. Again, and again.

My sense is that, for many people with whom I’ve been in contact this year, 2023 has been a mammoth year. Full of grace and gratitude, yet also requiring grit. The gratitude has been – amongst other things – for seeing the world emerging from a collective threat, and finding that we are, somehow, still standing. I can’t count the number of times someone has said to me “I don’t think we know the half of it yet - what Covid has cost us, and what its legacy is and will continue to be.” We know some of it – we know that we are dwelling in a global environment of grief and increasing mental health issues. But we are also amazed at ourselves, those of us who were lucky enough to survive.

I think collectively we have been navigating a strange urge to “get back to normal” whilst being aware, deep down, that no such thing exists.

And so, if you are anything like me you have been relying substantially on the people in your life with whom you have the aforementioned kind of relationships.

In this regard I am so very lucky. Now there’s an incongruity to what I am saying here. Because, when it comes to the relationships in my life it could be argued that they are not down to luck, as defined above. I invest fiercely in my relationships, and I choose that word deliberately. My people, my tribe – well they are everything to me. The lucky part though, is that our paths crossed in the first place.

Nearly 30 years ago, I was in an airport lounge. In those days I was still a drinker, so I was at the bar. I got chatting to a man and woman – business partners. I hardly remember him now, but she struck me. She had such a twinkle in her eye. I got her business card. She had wild curly hair that was being constrained in a bun, was pencil slim, and wore a pin-striped suit.

Some ten or so years later, I was a mother with little people to care for and dealing with the hardest of parenting scenarios (for me at any rate): schooling. I chose a farmyard school with wooden huts next door to where I lived. One day, in the playground I met this archetypal hippie chick mother in a flowing dress, with wild curly hair bouncing off her shoulders. We connected instantly, she had a son in my eldest child’s class, lived in the village just down the road from me, and I liked her immensely.

I don’t know for how long Cathy and I were friends before, during some facilitator “war story” telling session we were having, I realized she was one and the same person as the woman from the airport lounge bar. I dug out her business card and we laughed in amazement at the serendipity. Finding her again in my children’s school playground was pure luck.

Cathy and I are now, many years on, both members of Nancy Kline’s Global Faculty.

Nineteen years ago, Cathy introduced me to Susan. To help me with invoicing. But Susan is not the person who does my invoicing – although she does do that – Susan is actually the earthly embodiment of my Guardian Angel. It took me a long time to face up to the aspects of running my own business that I did not have affinity with, and it was having the pure, indelible trustworthiness of Susan Schuurmans that enabled me to let someone else step in to assist me with one such aspect. Susan calls me a rainmaker. The thing is, I get to make rain because of the solid ground she produces beneath my feet for the dance.

If Susan is my Guardian Angel, then Megan Hudson (who was introduced to me by Susan!) is my Magician, turning my words into beautiful, vibrant messages that reach out into the world so that my web of relationships reaches far and wide. Megan gives me courage. And she is deeply patient with me, for which I am so grateful.

And now, to complete the BraveHeart team I have been joined this year by Gill, who has – luckily – come full circle back into my life having been a student of mine in “another life” some 15 years ago! This trio of women surround me with love and support and do so much that enables me to feel safe.

Because luck runs out as well. At any moment, we know this in our bones, the unexpected can occur and despite all the investment you might have made in something or someone, you can be greeted by circumstances that not only surprise you but can shatter your confidence with their side-swipingattributes. You can put your faith and your effort into something, only to discover it just wasn’t enough. As luck would or would not have it…….. you face how fallible you are. Sometimes relationships fail.

I have noted in myself a somewhat childish tendency at times like these to take this turnaround of the vicissitudes of chance deeply personally. It is as though I forget that I didn’t really earn or deserve the good luck when it came my way, and I treat fickle chance as a particularly personal nemesis.

And so it is that in the depths of this self-pity I turn, with deep gratitude for all my luck, to the people who are always there, with a sane perspective and their entirely trustworthy faith in me despite my loss of relativity.

Whatever else we are doing with our holiday season, I hope that we all spend some time giving thanks for the people whom chance has placed on our path. I know I will. And, guess what? You ……. reading this, are amongst the people for whom I feel so blessed. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being one of my readers. It is for you that I try, each month, to find something meaningful to write. Some are better than others. You are always my gift. I am lucky indeed.

Blessings for the Holidays! And “see” you in 2024!

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